Afghanistan Now Rich, Buys Miami Timeshare

With the discovery of over a trillion dollars worth of lithium under its soil, Afghanistan has announced today that it will be moving its entire population to Miami Beach, Florida. The move comes as a surprise to many who believe the Afghanis naturally prefer their desert homeland.

In an announcement today, President Karzai said, “Are you kidding me? Who likes the goddam desert? I already prepaid for my timeshare yesterday and we are moving forward with plans to get everyone else in by mid-August.”

Yet others are still in disbelief. Said one high-ranking member of the US Department of State, “We never saw this coming. We knew that, in their heart of hearts, the Afghanis were a sea-going people, but most of our analysis indicated that they would most likely settle in Barbados or another of the Caribbean islands. We even had one model that showed a sixty percent chance they would simply import most of whats remaining of the Six Flags Theme Parks, which of course includes Great Escape Water Park.”