As Health Care For All Looms, GOP Races to Exclude Mexicans

With a vote (and possibly a passage) of the Health Care Bill coming up Sunday, the GOP is racing to find a new hot topic to be all upset about. Said one representative, “We know that there’s other things that we can say no to, but it’s been a real struggle finding that exact, right issue that people will supposedly also hate. Mexicans is a classic, but can we really carry this momentum to the mid-tern election on a Mexican bashing front? Actually, I think we can.”

The Pro-America, Anti-Mexican Tea Party movement is already taken hold. ”It has a natural segue,” Said Republican Jim Jimmings of Delaware. ”See, even if this bill passes, which it wont, and everyone finally backs it, which I’m sure will never happen, and people realize how amazing it will be for our entire country to have a real shot at decent health care and freedom from impending doom of Health Care costs, which is also not at all possible, we’ll have this whole other direction to go: Now that we’ve got it, should Mexicans get it too? I’m not sure I want to live in a country where Mexicans can get their hands on such a sweet health care package. ’Sweet’ meaning not at all what the people want, mind you.”

Speaking of the illegal immigrant issue and referring to them as, simply, Mexicans, John Johnson, of Michigan agreed. ”I agree with my honorable colleague, Mr. Jimmings. It’s bad enough that we’re ramming this health care down regular citizen’s throats, but once it’s rammed, should we allow it to be equitably rammed down throats of the Mexicans ramming across our borders? I think that’s an obvious no. No more ramming. We are a party against ramming. I think that message will really stand out in the coming months.”