Comments on: What Is “Maturity?”

By: lindseymwood

lindseymwood — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 04:08:08 +0000

Maturity is more about being aware of your options and taking responsibility. Awesome if any of that idea helped you.

By: Ricquel Seely

Ricquel Seely — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 01:34:02 +0000

You just helped my teenage life because so much more at ease, i am told repeatedly to be “mature” and you givng the list of examples and the “dont” list. It makes me feel like maybe im not being the bad guy in the situations ive been in.

By: Twood

Twood — Sat, 19 Nov 2011 01:48:00 +0000

You're going to have to make a major account for something as Capitalized as "Eternal Law" before I nod my head any which way.

By: Toyin

Toyin — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 16:15:58 +0000

Well said! If I may…I would like to say that as you had also grown into an understanding of the pain you had caused others through the experience of the pain you felt yourself, you matured. In this recognition lies the Eternal law of sowing and reaping. Here we find that not only did you reap what you had sown but that fortunately you learnt the lesson within the experience. It is not always the case and this can give rise to numerous unpleasant experiences.

By: Thomas Wood

Thomas Wood — Sat, 23 Apr 2011 22:58:05 +0000

Let the introspection begin.

By: Eric

Eric — Fri, 22 Apr 2011 04:35:07 +0000

Thomas Wood, I have returned. And I have discovered all truths since last we spoke. I shall pour it all into crushing you in the ‘Mature-Off’.

Regarding Ariane’s contribution, I can’t help but notice “its not about you” falls prey to the solipsist problem of “its probably about you”. Practically speaking though, it could work. But it’s just a specific case of one of the earlier general definitions we we’re throwing around way back when. Reading back through it all, I’m kinda surprised how good some of those were.

By: Thomas Wood

Thomas Wood — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 21:43:23 +0000

Really, all that’s left now is a Mature-Off. I challenge you to out mature me. Shall we say six am at the Chuck-e-cheese ball room?

By: Ariane

Ariane — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 22:26:35 +0000

Mmmm. I think I, at least, think of this aspect as more “wisdom”, as you say, than maturity, but it certainly highlights how vague our notion of maturity is.

I know someone who exactly fits your scenario – is generous to a fault (genuinely, not just quoting a saying), but really hasn’t got very far down the “not the centre of the universe path”. I think of that as immaturity, and don’t consider his consideration for others, and consideration in general to be the same thing. Having said that, I’m not sure I can defend that position objectively, it’s just the way I cast it, so I can’t claim my position is more valid than yours. They are certainly both aspects of experience, maturity and reasoned, rational existence. Interesting thoughts.

By: Thomas Wood

Thomas Wood — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 20:10:56 +0000

I don’t know. I still think maturity has more to do with consideration vs reaction, that is, that one considers, first, a possibility of range, and then the actual range of how they might respond to their environment. Maybe that’s another characteristic, maybe that’s just plain old “wisdom.”

Of course, considering others falls well within this category. I could imagine a counter argument to yours which imagines a fellow who was very giving, very generous, very altruistic. One could even imagine such a character being “too considerate” of others.

The point here is that it’s not whether one considers others, or even that there is more than themselves but, rather, that they have options besides their instinct, selfish or otherwise.

By: Ariane

Ariane — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 04:13:25 +0000

But the meme says “if”. Sometimes it is indeed about you. Maturity is about recognising when it is, rather then the default position of a child, that it is ALWAYS about you.

But yes, the meme doesn’t actually capture it all, because recognising that the universe doesn’t revolve around you is also about recognising that you are not the quintessential human being. Other people can be vastly different to you, and just because you can’t conceive of ever behaving like that, doesn’t mean it is entirely unreasonable behaviour for other people (for example choosing to seek asylum via boat rather than by flying to a new country, or petrol sniffing, or other things people think they would never do).

The other complicating factor is that this is by no means an all or nothing thing. People are constantly evolving in their understanding of what it means to not be the centre of the universe. I am constantly tripping over my own assumptions about the rest of the world based on my experiences alone. To use a terrible cliche, (I’m full of them aren’t I?) it’s a journey not a place.