You may have heard that Mitt Romney was attacked on a plane a few days ago. What you didn’t hear was how important the mission was that Romney is on. Reports have been coming in that the man who attacked was rapper Blu. Blu claims that he was only responding to Romney’s Vulcan Death Pinch.
In a time of such political uncertainty, this can only be good news. The Republicans have been scouring the land for a clear front-runner for the 2012 elections and a Vulcan may be their best bet. Notoriously logical and peaceful to a fault, the Vulcan race offers a stern change in Republican stereotypes of warmongering and illogical thinking.
What could the future bring? I don’t want to speculate too much, but I can’t help wondering if Romney will bring promise of a fully united Federation of Planets. I for one, already living in San Francisco, will have little to no trouble getting into Star Fleet once expeditions to unite the planets begin. But it raises the question, what of the others in this nation? I fear this may just be another typical Republican ploy: lure us in with promises of inter-galactic peace and exploration, charm us with folky, Vulcan affectations, then riddle us with a thirty year war once we refuse to sign the Khitomer Accords.
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