music

Diagnosis “Featuring Snoop Dogg”

December 29, 2010

In the future, the phrase, “featuring Snoop Dogg,” will be a common amendment to any medical condition with symptoms of heavy chills. “It appears you may be suffering from Whooping Cough featuring Snoop Dogg,” your doctor will inform you. It will take years for such a diagnosis to be refined. At first, doctors will be [...]

Pop Song Challenge

December 21, 2010

I want to create the worlds next number-one pop song. Seriously…for reals. So here’s the thing. I remember hearing this Michael Jackson song once back in 2001. I loved the song and probably heard it a dozen times in a row. What struck me about the song was how simple it was. I could hear [...]

Jukebox Sabotage

October 6, 2010

What’s the quickest way to set the mood in a place? It’s not the lighting or the decor. It’s not even the crowd. It’s the music. Here’s a neat little trick. Next time you’re in a bar filled with assholes, take charge, musically speaking. (A quick warning that this works best with one of those new, [...]

Justin Bieber’s Bangs Hide Map to Dry Land

April 20, 2010

It was discovered today that upon his forehead, well hidden by his signature bangs, is the long sought after map to Dry Land. The discovery of the fabled map, which holds clues to the last known location of dry land on earth, was foretold by many and seeking to rid them self of the sea farer’s ways. With [...]

“Everything’s Coming Out Bright Eyes” – Bright Eyes Parody Song/Tribute

February 23, 2010

This is a parody of then semi-popular, infamously morose Bright eyes. This was back in the Black Spot Radio Show days. It first aired in August of 2006. As with all things Black Spot, please pardon the poor quality of recording and lack of popguard.

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Jazz Shootings

February 11, 2010

You never hear about a shooting at a Jazz Club. I want this to happen more. Recently, we had a shooting at some hip-hop club down in the Wharf of San Francisco. (I was impressed to hear that there were even people out at the Wharf, let alone that enough had gathered to manifest an [...]

Why I hate DJs

January 27, 2010

There are simply too many goddam people calling themselves a DJ. My basic feeling is that DJing, like masturbation, should be done discretely and with a healthy sense of embarrassment. When did this become something anyone could call themselves in public? The DJ as a mythic figure would be written like this: A girl whispers [...]

What’s That Song in Your Head?

January 25, 2010

Do random songs ever pop into your head? I’m not talking about how some catchy tune was being played on the radio recently, or when a buddy is singing something and, like musical cooties, you pick up the melody. I’m talking about some song just droning on, inside your head with no discernable origin. This [...]

The Loss of the ‘Casual Hello’

July 28, 2009

A few years back, the Ipod came out and it seems, with it, we lost many opportunities for, what I’ll call, the ‘casual hello.’ The setup for this is simple: Remember, ‘back in the day,’ when somebody would walk by and you could look up, or walk up to them, and say, ‘hello?’ Remember that? [...]