People love analyzing the Ghostbusters, in part, because they represent many of the myriad sub-classes of nerds. Asking yourself which Ghostbuster you are like is really asking, “What kind of nerd am I?” Because you’re reading this, chances are, you’re one of these five class of nerd in some respect or another. Let’s look at the different classes and see where you fit.
Egon Spangler -
The Stoic Genius: You spend your afternoons tinkering with particle accelerators. When you masturbate, it is scheduled and documented for duration, consistency and given either a smiley-face or gold-star, depending on what the the P.K.E meter indicates. Ever the genius, you would have drilled a hole in your head if you thought it would advance science. You’re the guy all brainy kids want to be like, because you’re not bad looking and seem to be totally comfortable with what was sure to have been a poor grade in 4th grade gym-class. Men respect your authoritative stance on all things cross-stream related. Women suspect that you’re hung like a Sumerian overlord.
Peter Venkman -
The Cocky Wit: While the other’s are bogged down at the lab, you’re investigating the deeper mysteries of a scotch glass. You’ve spent your whole life in academia, testimony of your drive to discover, disseminate and date most of the undergraduate student-body. You grasp the gravity of every situation and are pretty sure it’s possible to work a pun about gravity into a come-on, if only you weren’t too busy dealing with “dickless over here.”
Ray Stantz -
The Driving Force: You’re the butt of every joke, but that’s only because you just stepped in something. Viewed from another perspective, you’re leading the way. You are the true nerd of the bunch, bold, unabashed and unafraid of any social ramifications, even if that means explaining the boner you got from the sexy-ghost wet-dream. If there’s slime, you play with it. If there’s a ghost lady, you get her or let her get you. When everyone else is afraid to choose the destructor, you’ve got the guts to harken back to a more innocent time when a marshmallow man meant sitting around the fire at camp Waconda. Also, you smoke, and smoking is cool.
Winston Zeddmore -
The Black Guy: You are, at best, peripheral. People will spend an hour talking about you, digging up obscure lines or potential sub-plots exactly because they are afraid that the only memorable thing about your character is that you happened to be black. What’s important about your character isn’t what you contribute, but how ancillary you really are. Because of this, other nerds will adore you in what I would like to call the “Bobba Fett” phenomenon. That is, because there isn’t much to say, those nerds who pride themselves on being the most obscure, the most esoteric, will flock to your few recognizable accomplishments. In essence, you are testimony of their snobbery, and so will probably grow in legend throughout time. You are Nerd-by-Proxy. It’s not that you don’t matter, just that you don’t matter to any of us.
Louis Tully -
Idiot Savant: Half man, half genius, half idiot, you are fifty percent sure that what you’re doing at any given moment can be written off as a business expense. Always the optimist, you didn’t mind being turned into a dog, realizing that it could have been much worse as it was “during the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants…” You’re very good with children, and women tend to adore your innocence. If only the world understood your depths, the things you’ve seen and felt, knowing, as so few do, how “many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day.”
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Dearest “Modern Sophist”,
I, myself, am not a philosopher by trade, although I took/sat in on many philosophy classes during my undergraduate degree (I decided to go into sociology, as I believe very strongly in Feuerbach’s eleventh thesis – if you aren’t familiar
– it basically states that people need to actually DO SOMETHING about the ills of the world, while philosophers simply ruminate over them) – do I have it wrong that “sophism” is derived from the Latin and Greek words meaning “wisdom”? I find the fact that you refer to yourself as a “sophist” quite blasphemous.
Are you familiar with the Ancient Greek concept of “eudaemonia”? If you are not, you need to read “Aristotle’s” *Nichomachean Ethics* – NOT the “wiki” entries that completely bastardize this path to wisdom.
I would actually go as far as to say you should stop purporting yourself as a “modern sophist” until you gain a little (read: a LOT) more wisdom. You are contributing to the hyperreality that will lead to the decline of western society.
So this is a “pop-culture” piece – maybe you need to rename this blog? Elsewhere, however, I do find claims to knowledge that are absolutely unreferenced, and in some cases, absolutely false.
Please do not use the blogosphere to disseminate falsities – the purpose of blogs are to fight against hegemonic mainstream thought, and I think the majority of us are doing a damn good job. Unfortunately, your blog seems to be an exception.
Best Wishes,
Scars
Dearest Scars,
If you read my about you will see that I make no claim to wisdom. You are semi-correct in the idea that sophism derives from wisdom, but incorrect in taking it further form there. The sophists were, basically, the pre-socrates philosophers. They tended to be more fond of the rhetoric than the truth and so their “wisdom” is questionable. As a student of philosophy I always appreciated the notion that the wisest man knows he isn’t wise. I chose the name “modern sophist” for two reasons: as a testament to my lack of wisdom (since I don’t believe the sophists were intrinsically wise), and because after thirty seven other options, it was an available domain.
Meanwhile, funny you should mention Eudaimonia as I have it tatted to my left forearm. I’m not a big fan of tattoos but I did always like the idea of finding something which you found interesting and representative enough to scar your body with. In my studies with an amazing professor on Aristotle this word (as it seems to have done for you) stood out to me. I claim no expert understanding in the concept, but certainly appreciate your sentiment.
Finally, you are overly harsh, sir, and a good ‘fuck off’ to you is in order. Since when is it unwise to advise parents to seek out more information before making any decision. And since when are blogs meant to fight against mainstream though? Granted, they certainly can, but blogs are representative of people, some are idiots, some are clever, some are dull and some are crazy. Take mine for what you will, but you’re never going to get your point (which I acknowledged had merit and even linked to so that other readers could see for themselves) across by being a dick and belittling people. That’s a very unsexy move for a scientist.
Holy hell, Scars. I had been replying from my dashboard and didn’t see that you were commenting on the goodam Ghostbusters piece. Fucking really, mister? You’re going to charge me with unwise assholism after a goddam Ghostbusters piece?
I mean, seriously, how are you going to criticize me for spreading falsehoods on a goddam ghostbusters, stupid, joke page?
My comment above still stands, but I’m starting to think that, if you’re willing to trash an entire person based off of one shitty ghostbuster piece, you might be on a mission that’s a little angrier than mine. No thank you, sir.
Scars-
So, uh…I am completely baffled by the arrogance that seems to so deeply effect your notion of what is considered worthy use of a sociology degree.
Though any reader should be SO impressed by your education, and the fact that you shun Wikipedia as an informational source, and though any reader should absolutely FAWN over your vast knowledge of Latin root words, Greek concepts, and famous theses…I am not so enamoured by the intellectual nuts you are attempting to flex.
While it is understandable that a graduate as BRILLIANT as yourself would be mildly disillusioned when discovering such lighthearted entries under a blog title such as “Modern Sophist”, and though your internet crusade against the unworthy masses to protect your beloved blogosphere is gallant, indeed…I had a glance at your blog, and dude? You quote the Joker. Not that I am no fan of the joker, but I just do not see how comic book villains are a credible source when attempting to…how did you put it? Ah, yes. Thwart the “decline of Western civilization”.
What have you done, but turn up your nose at and attempt to chastise someone who has made no such claim of action? Where are YOUR theses, what are YOUR concepts, how have you assisted humanity? And what good is your having a blog if barely anyone can even read it?
There are three things in this world that annoy me to extremes. The first one? Children with Cheeto fingers. The second one? Educated fools. The third? Hypocrites. Unless you were a particularly messy child, you are 2/3, my friend.
Now, I do not personally know this blogger, but I think the blog is amusing and like to read on my idle time. Especially at work. They are silly entries, but what’s wrong with silly? Just because it’s under the moniker “Modern Sophist” it has to cater to what YOU deem fit, or its original meaning?
I apologize if this has come off bitchy or harsh, but you came off sounding like a haughty prick. I understand that there is a lot of idiocy on the internet, and while I can sympathize with feeling annoyed and disparaged by it, how is this blog even comparable? Wow, this has gotten really long. I didn’t mean to even write this much, but people like you have been annoying me my entire life.
That being said, I voted for Peter. However, I was disappointed that there weren’t hybrid options. My offical vote? Peter/Black Guy.
Holy hellfire, Aimee, that’s two points to you. Meanwhile, I will consider hybrids for sure, but I think it might make people demand a Gozer or Zuul as well.
I am curious as to which Ghostbuster Scars is……
So am I, actually. I’m betting an Egon, but the rant had the stink of a Tully, with all due respect, of course.
Do I have to pick a ghostbuster? I find I often feel like Louis.
That’s alright, I’m sure she busted something.